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From: "Jane" <nospamplease@#rogers.com>
Subject: Re: Questions about Death in 1880
Date: Tue, 1 Nov 2005 18:16:13 -0500
References: <ZZc9f.131814$7b6.39109@twister.nyroc.rr.com> <1130811309.756687.160570@g14g2000cwa.googlegroups.com>


wrote:
> Remarry, you betcha.
>
> I have a lot of ancestors who were in Southern Ontario in the 1780's
> through 1900 working as farmers. Its amazing how many spouses many of
> them went through due to deaths (keeping in mind the average lifespan
> even in 1900 was about 45). Many people in my tree were married three
> times, and had children with each spouse....who often also often
> brought children from other marriages to the blended family.
>

My fathr's family were mostly around the Napanee area during the same time
period, and also were farmers. You're right in saying they usually remarried
after the death of a spouse.

> In an agrarian society, you NEEDED a spouse for survival, particularly
> with the large numbers of children most people had. I mean, can you
> imagine being a farmer or a farm wife with maybe 7 or 8 children 10
> and under, and losing your husband or wife? You'd be in big trouble in
> terms of being able to hold everything together so everyone could
> survive. No wife..who was going to do the cooking, the cleaning, the
> child rearing, run the chicken coop and the vegetable garden, put up
> the preserves for the winter, knit the socks, sew the clothes, etc.
> etc. etc. No husband, and who was going to chop the wood, plow the
> fields, bale the hay, build the new barn, clear the bottom 40 acres,
> bring in the crops etc. etc. Everyone's survival hinged on the work
> getting done on both sides of the tradition set of roles.
>
> I don't think it was terribly romantic, and I don't think they had
> enough choice in terms of potential candidates to worry about soul
> mates. Given how fast they seem to have remarried (at least many in my
> tree), I think that being a similar age, healthy, similar religion and
> ethnicity if possible, hey, more than good enough.
>

You also notice a lot of marriages where several brothers and sisters in one
family married sisters and brothers in another, and cases where second
cousins married. There really wasn't a very big pool of eligible candidates
in and around the small arming communities.

Jane


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