Down-Home-Chatter-L Archives

Archiver > Down-Home-Chatter > 1999-03 > 0921037807


From: "Barbara Lewallen" <>
Subject: Re: Humor
Date: Tue, 9 Mar 1999 22:50:07 -0500


BOO on Neal!!!!!! Shame, shame, shame!!!!!!!!!!!!!
All right, Neal, get your act together & quit bashing us intelligent
group of refined ladies!!!!!(G)
Bobbie
-----Original Message-----
From: <>
To: <>
Date: Tuesday, March 09, 1999 8:55 PM
Subject: Humor

>Sorry about this Ladies, but I just couldn't pass this one up.
>
>How many men does it take to open a beer?
>None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.
>
>Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
>Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will
>never be able to support you.
>
>Why do women have smaller feet than men?
>So they can stand closer to the kitchen sink.
>
>How do you know when a woman's about to say something smart?
>When she starts her sentence with "A man once told me..."
>
>How do you fix a woman's watch?
>You don't. There's a clock on the oven!
>
>Why do men pass gas more than women do?
>Because women won't shut up long enough to build up pressure.
>
>If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at
>the front door, which do you let in first? The dog of course...at
>least he'll shut up after you let him in.
>
>All wives are alike, but they have different faces so you can tell
>Them apart.
>
>What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
>A woman that won't do what she's told.
>
>What do you call a woman with two brain cells?
>Pregnant.
>
>What do you call a woman who has lost 95% of her intelligence?
>Divorced.
>
>I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was
>Always.
>
>I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months - I don't like to
>interrupt her.
>
>Bigamy is having one wife too many. Some say monogamy is the same.
>
>Scientists have discovered one certain food that diminishes a
>woman's sex drive by 90%...wedding cake
>
>
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>

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