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From: "Howard Fuller" <>
Subject: Re: [trivvies] Competitiveness
Date: Wed, 15 Jan 2003 16:50:32 -0000
References: <3E241899.000005.04871@oemcomputer> <013401c2bc35$b6aa5520$2e46063e@oemcomputer>


Sue - and Sharla,

Thank you for your comments, Sue. Your message must have got lost in
cyberspace as I hadn't seen it until it came (as below) under Sharla's own
remarks...

Maybe there's another possibility about my evident lack of competitiveness. I
was an only child, we lived in one of a strip of houses along a country main
road where *all* the neighbours were elderly... and for several significant
years (6-11) my only companion was a girl 2½ years my senior. I didn't have
any need to compete.

As for a job: I got a job with a major oil company in 1946 and, although I
moved round various departments (as it happened, all on the same site), I
retired from the same company in 1981.

Lucky? Mmm, maybe! Satisfactory? YES!

Howard
PS: I have very little appreciation of 'fashion', even in others. Comfort is
my style!


----- Original Message -----
From: "The Trivvie" <>
To: <>
Sent: Wednesday, January 15, 2003 1:30 AM
Subject: Re: [trivvies] Competitiveness


> Oh Sue,
> How your posting struck a chord with me!! Just replace my name with yours
> and I can safely say I was in the same boat ! Truly I kid you not. My
> brother is and was back then my mums little darling. My dad will do anything
> for a quite life and not rock the boat, oh how I wish sometimes he would
> have hollered or something !!
>
> Fashionable clothes were out of my league until I started work. Then I went
> to town you name it if it was in fashion I bought it. Sure my mum had the
> vapours every five minutes but boy was I happy!!
>
> And to be told by a boy you had a major crush on many years later in life
> that if your Mum hadnt dressed you in such "daggy" clothes then you would
> have had a lot of young men lining up to get you well what can I say!! The
> day I heard that one I was in a heck of a mood. To this day I will not
> tolerate seeing children judging another because of the clothes they wear or
> the way they look, many a time at the school we had little conversations
> about friends and why we like them and how we should treat them. Children
> soon open your eyes, because they will tell you straight what they are
> thinking and most have opinions instilled by their parents. Sometimes it
> isnt pleasant there are so many attitudes that are ingrained on children
> from birth, whether it be accidental or intentional it can make quite
> shocking listening.
>
> My childhood was spent moving from A to B and never really settled in one
> place so proper friendships were never formed. But here I sit typing on my
> computer to a list full of people who i have now known for a long time, yes
> a group of friends who let members wander in and out at will, who dont judge
> books by their covers but are willing to wait and open the pages and see
> whats inside.
>
> Thank you trivvies may all your worlds be a peace tonight .
> hugs
> Sharon xx
>
> > There was always someone better than me at most things I've done in my
> life
> > Howard, but I don't ever remember feeling rejected ... What made me feel
> > rejected was the lack of encouragement from my parents .. I wasn't a boy
> you
> > see, it made a huge difference to my Dad, & Mum didn't bother with my
> > schooling at all ... >
> >
> >
> > As a nipper I had to compete for friends --- I never wore the latest
> clothes
> > for instance, & this was, believe it or not, a great hindrance in my
> world
> > back then ... In the end - around 15 - I thought, bu**** it, & went my own
> > sweet way ... But ---- in a way I regretted that decision - cos I've gone
> > through life not competing for friendships & consequently, not having very
> > many friends ... In other words - I learnt that you can't have it both
> ways
> > ..
>
> > Like you, I've always striven to do everything I do in life, to the best
> of
> > my ability & usually, like you, I think I've succeeded, but it's not been
> > easy & certainly not without competition from one source or another ....
> >
> > Sue ---- who always tries to blend in the background - but who never quite
> > manages to do it ... :-)))) ...
>
>
>
>
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