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From: "Malvary J Cole" <>
Subject: Re: Mr/Mrs
Date: Sun, 3 Jul 2005 00:13:04 -0400
References: <200506301522.j5UFMGPD011110@lists2.rootsweb.com> <a06002002beecbcc3bd4b@[202.49.246.227]>


I was looking for some graves last weekend in a nearby cemetary and found
one little inocuous stone (about 2ft wide and 1 ft high) with the entry
engraved:

Mrs. George Thompson
1879-1906

I remarked it to my friend - "Poor woman, even in death she didn't have her
own identity recognized".

Malvary
"Graham Hoult" <> wrote in message
news:a06002002beecbcc3bd4b@[202.49.246.227]...
>
>
> When S Viemeister wrote
>
>> I had a customer, a 30-ish woman, who always signed her cheques as Mrs
>> (husband's forename/husband's surname).
>
> Steve Hayes <> commented:
>
>> I had a correspondent (American) who always signed herself as Mrs Paul
>> D.
>> Robinson.
>>
>> Naturally I had to start letters "Dear Mrs Robinson", because I thought
>> "Dear
>> Paul" would look off.
>
> and Maire Black added
>
>> This was normal in Ireland up to the 60s. When you married you were Mrs
>> yourhubands firstname and surname. If you signed Mrs
>> yourownfirstname-yourhusbandssurname it meant your husband had died.
>>
>> I was married in 1972 and have always used my own first name with my
>> husbands surname, even though my husband is very much alive. I used to
>> use Mrs, but now don't usually use any title.
>>
>> My mother only started using her own first name after my father died.
>
> Horses for courses. What is appropriate can depend on the circumstances.
>
> For many years I lived in a country district that had a rural mail
> delivery.
>
> Letters to my wife addressed as Barbara Hoult (+/- Mrs) came to the
> correct address but those addressed to Mrs B Hoult were usually delivered
> to my brother B----'s mailbox about half a kilometre down the road.
>
> A distant cousin D----- and his parents came to live on a nearby farm. His
> wife was also named Barbara. There was no way that the mailman could know
> where to deliver letters addressed to [Mrs] Barbara Hoult.
>
> If in doubt the mailman would leave the letter at our place as I had lived
> there longer. We could tell from a handwritten address (or the envelope)
> who it was for, but sometimes had to open the letter to find out. It was a
> simple enough matter to pop along the road to deliver the letter to the
> correct house.
>
> But wait, there's more ... <g>
>
> Not only did my cousin have a wife with the same name as my wife, his
> mother was generally known as B----. The mailman now had a choice of four
> letterboxes for letters addressed to Mrs B Hoult :-)
>
> Letters addressed to Mrs Graham Hoult (or Mrs G Hoult) were unambigous -
> as were those addressed to the other women using their husband's full
> name.
>
> In the fulness of time box distance-based box numbers came in, and it
> didn't matter how the letter was addressed *provided* the mailperson (by
> now a woman) sorted the mail correctly.
>
> Graham Hoult
> Kirwee, Canterbury, NZ
>


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