GEORGE-L Archives

From: Dave & Karen Devine <>
Subject: more jokes
Date: Mon, 12 Apr 1999 14:45:44 -0700

enjoy....Karen

> < Affair
> >>
> >> A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over,she puts her nine year old son in the closet. One day the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet as well. Inside the closet, the little boy says, "It's dark in here, isn't it?"
> >>
> >> "Yes, it is," the man replies.
> >>
> >> "You wanna buy a baseball?" the little boy asks.
> >>
> >> "No thanks," the man replies.
> >>
> >> "I think you do want to buy a baseball," the little extortionist
> continues.
> >>
> >> "OK. How much?" the man replies after considering the position he's
in.
> >>
> >> "Twenty-five dollars," the little boy replies.
> >>
> >> "TWENTY-FIVE DOLLARS?" the man repeats incredulously, but complies to
> >> protect his hidden position. The following week, the lover is visiting
> the
> >> woman again when she hears a car in the driveway and, again, places
her
> >> lover in the closet with her little boy.
> >>
> >> "It's dark in here, isn't it?" the boy starts off.
> >>
> >> "Yes, it is," replies the man.
> >>
> >> "Wanna buy a baseball glove?" the little boy asks.
> >>
> >> "OK. How much?" the hiding lover responds, acknowledging his
> disadvantage.
> >>
> >> "Fifty dollars," the boy replies and the transaction is completed.
> >>
> >> The next weekend, the little boy's father says "Hey, son. Go get your
> ball
> >> and glove and we'll play some catch."
> >>
> >> "I can't. I sold them," replies the little boy.
> >>
> >> "How much did you get for them?" asks the father, expecting to hear
the
> >> profit in terms of lizards and candy.
> >>
> >> "Seventy-five dollars," the little boy says.
> >>
> >> "SEVENTY-FIVE DOLLARS? That's thievery! I'm taking you to the church
> >> right now. You must confess your sin and ask for forgiveness," the
> father
> >> explains as he hauls the child away. At the church, the little boy
goes
> >> into the confessional, draws the curtain, sits down, and says "It's
dark
> in
> >> here, isn't it?"
> >>
> >> To which the priest exclaims, "Don't you start that shit in here."
> ----------------------------------------------
> What has three teeth and sixty feet?
> The front row at a Willie Nelson concert.
>
> What is the new O.J. web site address?
> slash.slash.backslash.escape
>
> What did the lesbian frog say to the other lesbian frog?
> They're right! We do taste like chicken!
>
> What do a Christmas tree and priest have in common?
> Their balls are just for decoration.
>
> What is the difference between erotic and kinky?
> Erotic is using a feather ... kinky is using the whole
> chicken.
>
> Why can't Helen Keller drive?
> Because she's a woman.
>
> Why don't blind people skydive?
> Because it scares the hell out of the dog.
>
> What has four legs and an arm?
> A happy pit-bull
>
> What do you get when you have a cow and a duck?
> Milk and quackers.
>
> How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?
> It's not hard
>
> Redneck Joke
>
> A guy in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Wanna
> hear a
> "redneck" joke?"
>
> The guy next to him replies, "Before you tell that joke you should
> know
> something. I'm 6' tall, 200 lbs. and a redneck. The guy sitting
> next to me
> is 6'2", 225 lbs. and a redneck. The fella next to him is 6'5",
> 250 lbs.
> and also is a redneck. Do you still want to tell that joke?"
>
> The first guy says, "Nah. I don't want to have to explain it three
> times."

This thread:

• more jokes by Dave & Karen Devine <>