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Archiver > GenHumor > 2008-06 > 1213377273


From: "Edna Wakeham" <>
Subject: [GENHUMOR] Fw: AMAZING SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES (Sr. Jean)
Date: Fri, 13 Jun 2008 12:14:33 -0500


AMAZING SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES

1. IF YOU'RE CHOKING ON AN ICE CUBE, SIMPLY POUR A CUP OF BOILING WATER DOWN YOUR THROAT. PRESTO!THE BLOCKAGE WILL INSTANTLY REMOVE ITSELF.

2. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLESWHILE YOU CHOP.

3. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES,THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE ON YOUR VEINS. REMEMBER TO USE A TIMER

4. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM ROLLING OVER ANDGOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON.

5. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH.

6. YOU ONLY NEED TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40.IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE.
< BR>7. REMEMBER - EVERYONE SEEMS NORMAL UNTIL YOU GET TO KNOW THEM.

8. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM.

9. IF YOU HAVE THE HICCUPS, TAKE A SHOT OF VODKA AND STAND ON YOUR HEAD UNTIL THEY GO AWAY. IF IT DOESN'T WORK THE FIRST TIME, CONTINUE THE PROCESS UNTIL YOU EITHER PASS OUT OR SO DRUNK YOU DON'T KNOW YOU HAVE THE HICCUPS.

DAILY THOUGHT: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES - NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS.










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