MDALLEGA-L Archives

Archiver > MDALLEGA > 2008-06 > 1213757120


From:
Subject: Re: [MDALLEGA] Adopted Children
Date: Tue, 17 Jun 2008 22:45:20 EDT


Hi Shirley:

Speaking only for our work, we suspect that any "rules" you find would
likely say adoptees should not be included at all, in any shape or form. We agree
that is unduly harsh, but we also feel that listing them with no indication
that they are not part of the "blood line" is also dishonest.

We have chosen to list them with an asterisk somewhere before their name,
coded elsewhere as NBL, for non-blood line.

We do the same for step-children brought into a family - list all the
children, but indicate which ones are not in the blood line.

This could prevent a problem, for instance, if the adopted person has never
been told they were adopted, but we do not participate in "pretending" or
distorting history to salve someone's feelings.

Just the way we do it...

Vince


In a message dated 6/17/2008 8:19:08 P.M. Central Daylight Time,
writes:

Being an adoptive parent, regardless of the fact the child we adopted was
the daughter of my wife first cousin, adoptive children are legally part of
"your" family. This make them part of the family with out question. By all
means if you can retain the natural parent information all the better. But
to exclude them from your family genealogy after the children were legally
adopted would be wrong. Would you not include them in your will? How would
it read. I leave 30% to my natural children and leave 10 to my child who was
adotped???Botten line. Do not exclude these children from a genealogy.. My
two cents

-----Original Message-----
From:
[mailto:]On Behalf Of Ann Davis
Sent: Tuesday, June 17, 2008 5:17 PM
To:
Subject: Re: [MDALLEGA] Adopted Children


Regardless of the rules, I would include them as children along with any
natural children. Obviously, they consider themselves in this family and to
indicate otherwise would be very disappointing to them I'm sure.
I understand you wish to be accurate, but I wouldn't risk the hurt feelings
and pain you could cause by listing them as adopted. In time, they
themselves may wish to look for their real families, but I'd wait for that
to happen and not do it that way now. I imagine as they get older, their
feelings about being listed as "adopted" will change.
That's just my opinion, I know it isn't accurate but some things can be more
important. You can always modify it at a later date.
----- Original Message -----
From: "Shirley Duke" <>
To: <>
Sent: Tuesday, June 17, 2008 4:57 PM
Subject: [MDALLEGA] Adopted Children


>> I have a peculiar situation---I have several adopted nieces and nephews
>> who
>>> has asked me for our ancestry documentation. They apparently consider
>>> themselves as part of the family (as I also do) but they just aren't. I
>>> find it awkward to list them as "adopted" for fear of hurting their
>>> feelings
>>> but for "documentation" for the future, I feel it should be addressed
>>> that
>>> they are not of the family line.
>>> Are there any rules for addressing this type of situtation?
>>> Shirley
>>>
>>
>
> -------------------------------
> To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to
> with the word 'unsubscribe' without the
> quotes in the subject and the body of the message


----------------------------------------------------------------------------
----



No virus found in this incoming message.
Checked by AVG.
Version: 8.0.100 / Virus Database: 270.3.0/1505 - Release Date: 6/16/2008
7:20 AM


-------------------------------
To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to
with the word 'unsubscribe' without the quotes
in the subject and the body of the message



-------------------------------
To unsubscribe from the list, please send an email to
with the word 'unsubscribe' without the quotes in the subject and the
body of the message





**************Gas prices getting you down? Search AOL Autos for
fuel-efficient used cars. (http://autos.aol.com/used?ncid=aolaut00050000000007)

This thread: