NCSCOTS-L Archives

From: Gerald Daniel <>
Subject: [NCSCOTS] [Fwd: Tribute to A Highlander]
Date: Wed, 30 Aug 2000 11:23:31 -0400

I think we can always use a good laugh :>)

Robert Fraser Andrews wrote:

> Hello Friends,
>
> The following came to me this morning from a friend in Australia.
>
> Bob
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
> Edward Longshanks (Edward I of England) comes to Scotland to conquer the
> Scots. He brings 4,000 men with him. As he nears the battlefield there
> suddenly appears a solitary figure on the crest of the hill. A short,
> ginger-haired guy in a kilt.
> "Hammer o' the Scots?" yells the wee Scottish guy on the hill. "Come up
> here, ya English bastard, and I'll give ye a hammerin'!"
> Edward turns to his commander. "Send 20 men to deal with that little
> Scottish upstart, there's a good chap!", he says. The commander sends
> twenty of his best men over the hill to kill the Scotsman.
> Ten minutes later, at the crest of the hill, the little Scot appears again.
> "Ya English bampots!", he yells. "Come on the rest of ye!! Come on, I'll
> have ye a'!!!"
> Edward is getting somewhat annoyed. He turns to his commander. "Send 100
> men to kill that little guttersnipe!" The commander sends a hundred man
> over the hill to do the job.
> Ten minutes later, the little Scot appears at the top of the hill once more,
> his hair all sticking up, his shirt a wee bit torn. "Ya English SCUM!", he
> yells. "I'm just warming up!! Come and get me, ya English gits!!"
> Edward losses patience. "Commander, take 400 men and personally WIPE HIM
> OFF THE EARTH!", he yells. The commander gulps, but leads four hundred men
> on horseback over the crest of the hill.
> Ten minutes later, the little Scotsman is back. His clothing is all torn,
> his face is covered in blood, snot and Irn-Bru. "Is that the best ye can
> do??? You're bloody WIMMIN!!! Come on!! Come and have a go ya bunch of
> Jessies!!!", he yells.
> Edward turns to his second in command. "Take 1000 men over that hill and
> don't come back till you've killed him!" he commands. The second in command
> gathers the men and they ride off over the hill to their fate.
> Ten minutes later, one of the English troops appears back at the top of the
> hill. He's covered in blood and his clothes are all torn. "Your Majesty!!
> he yells. "It's a trap!!! There's TWO of them!!!
>
> http://thefrasers.com
> This site is dedicated to all
> people of the name FRASER and
> - SCOTLAND-

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• [NCSCOTS] [Fwd: Tribute to A Highlander] by Gerald Daniel <>