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Archiver > ONTARIO > 1998-09 > 0906007713

From: John Helmut Merz <>
Subject: English spoken here!
Date: Wed, 16 Sep 1998 21:48:33 -0700

English is spoken around the world, I get e-mails from all parts,
I noticed even the Aussies speak it, although some people don't
seem to understand their dialect, but we even have that problem
right here in Ontario, there are many subscribers who do not
know how to read postings or taglines and instructions.

Here are some samples of "English well talking,
or "Here speeching American":

In Tokyo: "Is forbidden to steal hotel towels, please. If you are
not person to do such thing, please not to read notis."

Bucharest: "The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that
time we regret that you will be unbearable."

Belgrade: "Please leave your values at the front desk."

Athens: "Visitors are expected to complain at the office between
the hours of 9 and 11 a.m. daily."

Japan: "You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid."

Hong Kong tailor shop (before take-over): "Ladies may have a fit

Bangkok dry cleaner's: "Drop your trousers here for best results."

In a Rome laundry: "Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the
afternoon having a good time."

In the office of a Roman doctor:
"Specialist in women and other diseases."

In a Polish tour agency: "Take one of our horse-driven City tours.
We guarantee no miscarriages.

(From R. Lederer, Anguished English, 1987.)

Good Night, Irene, your list owner John, :^)
And listen, no more OCFA messages tonite - check the archives, eh?

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