PADUTCH-LIFE-L Archives

From: "Vee L. Housman" <>
Subject: 37-Sally's Wedding Plans
Date: Tue, 01 Sep 1998 18:52:56 -0400

SALLY’S WEDDING PLANS

Sally Lauderbauch made up her mind to marry the farmer's
son who I recommended for her, and she sent me an invitation to
her wedding. She wants to make a big thing out of it, and about
one hundred invitations were sent out. I don't think I and Polly will
go since we don't believe in making such a big fuss over something
like that. Also, a wedding gift would be required, and I really can't
afford it.

If I were a young man, I wouldn't want to drive a crowd of
people to my wedding like blind mules are driven to the
marketplace. Marriage is a serious thing, and if there is one time in
a man's life when he needs all his blessings it's when he stands in
front of a minister to take those wedding vows. How can a man be
expected to face such an important event in his life when he's as
frightened as a rabbit in the midst of a pack of dogs.

After the minister is finished with the ceremony the couple is
led through the crowd while the women kiss the bride and the men
comment, "I wish you much joyfulness," and so forth. I think I'd
just as soon hang as be caught up in such a situation. Afterwards it's
time to view the wedding presents. If a rich man brings a small
present, you'll hear critical comments of him. If a poor man brings
an expensive gift, you'll hear, "It would have been better for him to
pay off his debts." By the time the whole is over with, the wedding
will cost more than the value of all the presents put together, and
half the presents will be of no use to a young wife.

If I were a young girl, and my father wanted to pay for a big
wedding, I'd tell him, "Daddy, a big wedding will just cost too
much. I don't want you to waste your money. Instead of paying for
a big wedding, take the money and buy me a kitchen cupboard set."

Of course, many young people like to make a big show at
their wedding. They like to show off their nice clothing, and they
can't try hard enough to act big and important. They start out by
flying high. They are trying to build a roof to their house before it
even has a basement, and in all my life I have never seen a house
built that way standing for long. It's always good to start with small
things first. It doesn't matter how high the eagle flies, it always has
to return to earth to feed.

Once I was invited to a wedding and instead of going, I sent
the bride a gift pie pan with these words, "More joy in a good apple
pie than in a golden necklace." This insulted the young bride, and
she wouldn't speak to me for a year. After that she began to think
of me and once made the comment that the pie pan was a symbol of
fruitfulness. That symbol helped her to find that the shortest road to
a man's heart is through his stomach. In other words, she learned
that good bread and pies and butter on the table will go far in
keeping her husband in a good mood. She learned that sour bread,
half-baked pies, and stinking butter would bring her a grouchy,
cranky husband.

A chance for a successful marriage is lost when young people
approach it by pretending to be something that they are not and
spending more than they can afford. "Begin with something small
and build to something big," is an old saying that rings true around
the world.

* * *

Note: This collection of Boonastiel stories was written by H. A.
Harter in the original Penna-Dutch dialect and were published in the
Keystone Gazette, Bellefonte, PA, between 1894 and 1904. They
were translated and transcribed by Bob James of Alaska and they
are being posted to this PADUTCH-LIFE mailing list with his
permission.

This thread:

• 37-Sally's Wedding Plans by "Vee L. Housman" <>