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Archiver > PENNINGTON > 1999-05 > 0925930139


From: "Bill Pennington" <>
Subject: Re: [PENNINGTON-L] Outrageous
Date: Wed, 5 May 1999 14:48:59 -0400


Hi Cousins,
To start, I would hope that any physical discipline would be a
last resort after diplomacy and other methods had failed. Of course
its a matter of degree, whether an inanimate object is used or not.
In my community growing up, a paddle was the instrument of choice.
Paddles of different shapes and sizes were even sold in the corner
stores. Abuse can happen with or without an object. Today, I think
the use of paddles was "heavy handed", but I do not think it was
abuse.
We exercise power and control over our children's lives in many
ways besides physical discipline. And so we should. Parents should
be involved in their children's lives. Using that power and control
as you see best to help a child reach his or her dreams should be
commended. The fine line between this and control that becomes abuse
can get get complicated as many parents who've argued with their
children over music, friends, etc.. will attest. If our children are
getting the "wrong" message from any of these avenues, the parent
should step in.
Society is less forgiving if the lesson is not learned. Consider
the growth of our prison population. We as a nation have sent those
people to their room, many never to come out for years. At a cost of
$20,000 to $30,000 per inmate per year, couldn't this money be better
spent. All this when funds for education as well as other human
services have been cut.
From: Carolyn McDaniel <>
To: <>
Date: Wednesday, May 05, 1999 11:02 AM
Subject: [PENNINGTON-L] Outrageous

> As you rightly point out, there is a difference between abuse
>and punishing children with swats and light spankings. The
difference
>is in degree and manner of administration, and I would certainly
agree
>that this does not produce mass murderers. As to slapping in the
face, if this
>were done to an adult it would be assault.
> I also was raised in the era of corporal punishment, and
>raised my own three children with spankings and swats. What does
that
>have to do with beating a child with a belt? What does it have to do
>with raising a child to be a loving, whole, healthy individual
>instead of a child grown large, full of hate and rage? What does it
>have to do with establishing healthy discipline and boundaries, and
>respect for one's fellow man? I think very little.
> Physical punishment has very little to do with discipline.
>What it has to do with is maintaining power and control over another
>person. It is most often employed by persons who haven't the
>capability to relate to others. It produces, if not mass murderers,
>other emotional and physical abusers, and control freaks.

>Carolyn McDaniel
>
>http://www.teleport.com/~cmacdee
>
>
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